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Shoulder Angel Meets Shawn Bradley05:50

Shoulder Angel Meets Shawn Bradley

Transcript:

Jason: Okay, I pick James.
Stacey: Okay, we want Jeremy. Yeah.
Jason: Adam.
Adam: Yeah.
Jason: Nice. Oh great, Shawn's here.
Shawn Bradley: Hey, sorry I'm late, guys. I'm sorry, man.
Stacey: It's cool. Of course, we're gonna want Stephen. All right!
Jason: We got stuck with Shawn last time! Are you kidding me?
Shawn Bradley: Come on, guys, I promise, I'll try really hard this time, I promise.
Jason: Come on, Shawn, just… try not to embarrass us, okay?
James: Yeah, and don't get near the hoop.
Jason: Yeah.
Adam: Or the ball.
Jason: Yeah. Just… maybe you can play point guard or something, okay?

Stephen: Hey, Shawn? If you need a little extra edge on the court, you should try some of these.
Shawn Bradley: Oh, I don't know, man.

Matt: Poof!
Shawn Bradley: Who are you?
Matt: I am your Shoulder...good heavens! I just came to see if you needed some help, but clearly, you have everything covered, so...
Shawn Bradley: Actually, no um… I… I... I think I could use your help.
Matt: It's like someone put a pair of pants on a ladder. Okay, Shawn, allow me to just…Okay…

Matt: The air is so much thinner up here. Shawn, just say no.
Shawn Bradley: No thanks, Stephen.
Matt: Very good, Shawn, I'm proud of you. I would usually jump down at this point, but I don't want to break my spine. Would you mind if I just slowly…

Stephen: Oh man, here comes your mom!
Mallory: There you are, young man, I have been worried sick! Shawn, I don't deserve this. I, the woman who spent thirty-six hours in labour bringing all of you into this world. Wait a minute, you're not about to go and play basketball again, are you? Shawn, we've been over this. You need to focus on your education, so you can take over your father's business of test-driving Smart cars. Why are you dressed this way?
Stephen: I wouldn't tell the truth, man.
Matt: Oh, you will pay for this, Stephen! Give me your body! A little closer!

Shawn Bradley: So… what should I do?
Matt: Don't lie.
Shawn Bradley: Okay, mom, I… look, I was gonna play basketball, because I really like it.
Mallory: Fine. But when you grow up and get a real job, you'll wish you hadn't spent so much time playing games. Also, I don't want you hanging out with Stephen anymore. He gave me some pills for a headache last week, and they worked, but I haven't slept in six days, so… Just something to think about. Okay.

Matt: While I'm up here, is there any other moral dilemma I can help you with, because seriously, I'm not climbing back up here for at least a month.
Shawn Bradley: I think I'm good.
Matt: Okay.
Shawn Bradley: Thanks for your help, man.
Matt: No problem.
Stephen: Hey, Shawn. Have you ever vandalized a building?
Matt: No!

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